AnythingGoes

AnythingGoes https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/list/AnythingGoes/ Some bawdy stuff, but no gratuitous profanity. Much of the material is original, not simply passed along from someone else en-us Sat, 14 Nov 2026 07:53:00 GMT Pro Dada v11.21.0 stable 2023-08-07 (j)Edgar's Family Traditions https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261113053356/ <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">Edgar's family has two traditions.</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p> </p> <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">One tradition is every Thanksgiving, Edgar strips naked and screws the turkey until he collapses, exhausted, in a sweaty heap. They don't stuff it (Edgar took care of that part), but they do bake it.</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p> </p> <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">The other tradition is Edgar always takes his family to the annual IRS employee picnic.</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p> </p> <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">Pretty much the same thing.</span></span></span></span></span></p>  <form action="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi" method="post" accept-charset="UTF-8" id="subscription_form" target="_self" > <input type="hidden" name="flavor" id="ddm_flavor" value="subscribe" > <div class="row"> <div class="small-12 columns"> <input type="hidden" name="list" id="ddm_list" value="AnythingGoes" > <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns"> <label class="medium-text-right" for="ddm_email" > Email Address </label> </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="email" name="email" id="ddm_email" value="" required="required" placeholder="user@example.com (required)" > </div> </div> <div id="ddm_subscriber_fields"> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns medium-text-right large-text-right"> <input type="checkbox" class="list_consents" name="consent_1" value="1" id="consent_1" required="required" > </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <label for="consent_1"> We don't do double opt-in. You can unsubscribe at any time. </label> </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns">   </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="submit" name="submit_button" value="Subscribe" class="button success expand" id="ddm_subscribe_button" > </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-12 medium-12 columns large-centered medium-centered"> <p class="text-center"> Unsubscribe at Anytime | <a href="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/privacy_policy/AnythingGoes/" target="_blank" > Privacy Policy </a> </p> </div> </div> </div> </div> </form>  Fri, 13 Nov 2026 10:33:00 GMT https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261113053356/ (j)Punishing Telescammers, #422 https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261112053359/ <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">Let him give his whole pitch, then say, "I made $15 million last year. How much did you make?"</span></span></span></span></p>  <form action="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi" method="post" accept-charset="UTF-8" id="subscription_form" target="_self" > <input type="hidden" name="flavor" id="ddm_flavor" value="subscribe" > <div class="row"> <div class="small-12 columns"> <input type="hidden" name="list" id="ddm_list" value="AnythingGoes" > <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns"> <label class="medium-text-right" for="ddm_email" > Email Address </label> </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="email" name="email" id="ddm_email" value="" required="required" placeholder="user@example.com (required)" > </div> </div> <div id="ddm_subscriber_fields"> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns medium-text-right large-text-right"> <input type="checkbox" class="list_consents" name="consent_1" value="1" id="consent_1" required="required" > </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <label for="consent_1"> We don't do double opt-in. You can unsubscribe at any time. </label> </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns">   </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="submit" name="submit_button" value="Subscribe" class="button success expand" id="ddm_subscribe_button" > </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-12 medium-12 columns large-centered medium-centered"> <p class="text-center"> Unsubscribe at Anytime | <a href="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/privacy_policy/AnythingGoes/" target="_blank" > Privacy Policy </a> </p> </div> </div> </div> </div> </form>  Thu, 12 Nov 2026 10:33:00 GMT https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261112053359/ What were the parents thinking, names #99 https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261111053403/ <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">Dick Hung </span></span></span></span></p> <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">Dick Dick</span></span></span></span></p> <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">Dick Dong</span></span></span></span></p>  <form action="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi" method="post" accept-charset="UTF-8" id="subscription_form" target="_self" > <input type="hidden" name="flavor" id="ddm_flavor" value="subscribe" > <div class="row"> <div class="small-12 columns"> <input type="hidden" name="list" id="ddm_list" value="AnythingGoes" > <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns"> <label class="medium-text-right" for="ddm_email" > Email Address </label> </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="email" name="email" id="ddm_email" value="" required="required" placeholder="user@example.com (required)" > </div> </div> <div id="ddm_subscriber_fields"> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns medium-text-right large-text-right"> <input type="checkbox" class="list_consents" name="consent_1" value="1" id="consent_1" required="required" > </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <label for="consent_1"> We don't do double opt-in. You can unsubscribe at any time. </label> </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns">   </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="submit" name="submit_button" value="Subscribe" class="button success expand" id="ddm_subscribe_button" > </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-12 medium-12 columns large-centered medium-centered"> <p class="text-center"> Unsubscribe at Anytime | <a href="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/privacy_policy/AnythingGoes/" target="_blank" > Privacy Policy </a> </p> </div> </div> </div> </div> </form>  Wed, 11 Nov 2026 10:34:00 GMT https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261111053403/ (j)One-liner #350 https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261110052908/ <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">How do you know when your clock is still hungry? It goes back four seconds.</span></span></span></span></p>  <form action="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi" method="post" accept-charset="UTF-8" id="subscription_form" target="_self" > <input type="hidden" name="flavor" id="ddm_flavor" value="subscribe" > <div class="row"> <div class="small-12 columns"> <input type="hidden" name="list" id="ddm_list" value="AnythingGoes" > <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns"> <label class="medium-text-right" for="ddm_email" > Email Address </label> </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="email" name="email" id="ddm_email" value="" required="required" placeholder="user@example.com (required)" > </div> </div> <div id="ddm_subscriber_fields"> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns medium-text-right large-text-right"> <input type="checkbox" class="list_consents" name="consent_1" value="1" id="consent_1" required="required" > </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <label for="consent_1"> We don't do double opt-in. You can unsubscribe at any time. </label> </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns">   </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="submit" name="submit_button" value="Subscribe" class="button success expand" id="ddm_subscribe_button" > </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-12 medium-12 columns large-centered medium-centered"> <p class="text-center"> Unsubscribe at Anytime | <a href="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/privacy_policy/AnythingGoes/" target="_blank" > Privacy Policy </a> </p> </div> </div> </div> </div> </form>  Tue, 10 Nov 2026 10:29:00 GMT https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261110052908/ IRS T-shirts, #290 https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261109053603/ <p style="margin-top:7px; margin-bottom:7px"><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:10.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">IRS:</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-top:7px; margin-bottom:7px"><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:10.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">Employees Who Are</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-top:7px; margin-bottom:7px"><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:10.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">Passionately Devoted To</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p style="margin-top:7px; margin-bottom:7px"><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:10.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">Scamming and Stealing</span></span></span></span></span></p>  <form action="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi" method="post" accept-charset="UTF-8" id="subscription_form" target="_self" > <input type="hidden" name="flavor" id="ddm_flavor" value="subscribe" > <div class="row"> <div class="small-12 columns"> <input type="hidden" name="list" id="ddm_list" value="AnythingGoes" > <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns"> <label class="medium-text-right" for="ddm_email" > Email Address </label> </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="email" name="email" id="ddm_email" value="" required="required" placeholder="user@example.com (required)" > </div> </div> <div id="ddm_subscriber_fields"> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns medium-text-right large-text-right"> <input type="checkbox" class="list_consents" name="consent_1" value="1" id="consent_1" required="required" > </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <label for="consent_1"> We don't do double opt-in. You can unsubscribe at any time. </label> </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns">   </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="submit" name="submit_button" value="Subscribe" class="button success expand" id="ddm_subscribe_button" > </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-12 medium-12 columns large-centered medium-centered"> <p class="text-center"> Unsubscribe at Anytime | <a href="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/privacy_policy/AnythingGoes/" target="_blank" > Privacy Policy </a> </p> </div> </div> </div> </div> </form>  Mon, 09 Nov 2026 10:36:00 GMT https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261109053603/ (j)Donkey instead of turkey https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261108061405/ <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">Just think...if the Indians had given the Pilgrim Fathers a donkey instead of a turkey, we would all be having a piece of ass for Thanksgiving.</span></span></span></span></span></p>  <form action="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi" method="post" accept-charset="UTF-8" id="subscription_form" target="_self" > <input type="hidden" name="flavor" id="ddm_flavor" value="subscribe" > <div class="row"> <div class="small-12 columns"> <input type="hidden" name="list" id="ddm_list" value="AnythingGoes" > <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns"> <label class="medium-text-right" for="ddm_email" > Email Address </label> </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="email" name="email" id="ddm_email" value="" required="required" placeholder="user@example.com (required)" > </div> </div> <div id="ddm_subscriber_fields"> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns medium-text-right large-text-right"> <input type="checkbox" class="list_consents" name="consent_1" value="1" id="consent_1" required="required" > </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <label for="consent_1"> We don't do double opt-in. You can unsubscribe at any time. </label> </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns">   </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="submit" name="submit_button" value="Subscribe" class="button success expand" id="ddm_subscribe_button" > </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-12 medium-12 columns large-centered medium-centered"> <p class="text-center"> Unsubscribe at Anytime | <a href="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/privacy_policy/AnythingGoes/" target="_blank" > Privacy Policy </a> </p> </div> </div> </div> </div> </form>  Sun, 08 Nov 2026 11:14:00 GMT https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261108061405/ (j)Skinny turkey https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261107053017/ <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">It's the day before Thanksgiving and the butcher is just locking up when a man pounds on the door.</span></span></span></span></span></p> <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""> </span></span></span></p> <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">"Please let me in! I forgot to buy a turkey and my wife will kill me if I don't come home with one." </span></span></span></span></span></p> <p> </p> <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">"OK. Let me see what's left." </span></span></span></span></span></p> <p> </p> <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">He goes into the freezer and discovers that there's only one scrawny turkey left. He brings it out to show the man. </span></span></span></span></span></p> <p> </p> <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">"That one's too skinny. What else have you got?" </span></span></span></span></span></p> <p> </p> <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">The butcher takes the bird back into the freezer and waits a few minutes then brings the same turkey back out to the man. </span></span></span></span></span></p> <p> </p> <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">"Oh no, that one doesn't look any better. You'd better give me both of them."</span></span></span></span></span></p>  <form action="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi" method="post" accept-charset="UTF-8" id="subscription_form" target="_self" > <input type="hidden" name="flavor" id="ddm_flavor" value="subscribe" > <div class="row"> <div class="small-12 columns"> <input type="hidden" name="list" id="ddm_list" value="AnythingGoes" > <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns"> <label class="medium-text-right" for="ddm_email" > Email Address </label> </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="email" name="email" id="ddm_email" value="" required="required" placeholder="user@example.com (required)" > </div> </div> <div id="ddm_subscriber_fields"> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns medium-text-right large-text-right"> <input type="checkbox" class="list_consents" name="consent_1" value="1" id="consent_1" required="required" > </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <label for="consent_1"> We don't do double opt-in. You can unsubscribe at any time. </label> </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns">   </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="submit" name="submit_button" value="Subscribe" class="button success expand" id="ddm_subscribe_button" > </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-12 medium-12 columns large-centered medium-centered"> <p class="text-center"> Unsubscribe at Anytime | <a href="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/privacy_policy/AnythingGoes/" target="_blank" > Privacy Policy </a> </p> </div> </div> </div> </div> </form>  Sat, 07 Nov 2026 10:30:00 GMT https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261107053017/ Cat Law #20 https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261106053155/ <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="text-autospace:none"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:Consolas"><span style="color:black">Law of Obedience Resistance - A cat's resistance varies in proportion to a human's desire for her to do something.</span></span></span></span></span></span></p>  <form action="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi" method="post" accept-charset="UTF-8" id="subscription_form" target="_self" > <input type="hidden" name="flavor" id="ddm_flavor" value="subscribe" > <div class="row"> <div class="small-12 columns"> <input type="hidden" name="list" id="ddm_list" value="AnythingGoes" > <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns"> <label class="medium-text-right" for="ddm_email" > Email Address </label> </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="email" name="email" id="ddm_email" value="" required="required" placeholder="user@example.com (required)" > </div> </div> <div id="ddm_subscriber_fields"> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns medium-text-right large-text-right"> <input type="checkbox" class="list_consents" name="consent_1" value="1" id="consent_1" required="required" > </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <label for="consent_1"> We don't do double opt-in. You can unsubscribe at any time. </label> </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns">   </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="submit" name="submit_button" value="Subscribe" class="button success expand" id="ddm_subscribe_button" > </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-12 medium-12 columns large-centered medium-centered"> <p class="text-center"> Unsubscribe at Anytime | <a href="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/privacy_policy/AnythingGoes/" target="_blank" > Privacy Policy </a> </p> </div> </div> </div> </div> </form>  Fri, 06 Nov 2026 10:31:00 GMT https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261106053155/ (j)Punishing Telescammers, #421 https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261105053601/ <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">When he asks you a question, reply with, "I'm sorry that fellow threw your mother in front of the train. Did he go to prison for that?" After a couple of exchanges, change it to the father. "Did you ever find out why that man threw your father in front of the train?" Then later, "Sorry, but I have a train to catch." Then hang up.</span></span></span></span></p>  <form action="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi" method="post" accept-charset="UTF-8" id="subscription_form" target="_self" > <input type="hidden" name="flavor" id="ddm_flavor" value="subscribe" > <div class="row"> <div class="small-12 columns"> <input type="hidden" name="list" id="ddm_list" value="AnythingGoes" > <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns"> <label class="medium-text-right" for="ddm_email" > Email Address </label> </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="email" name="email" id="ddm_email" value="" required="required" placeholder="user@example.com (required)" > </div> </div> <div id="ddm_subscriber_fields"> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns medium-text-right large-text-right"> <input type="checkbox" class="list_consents" name="consent_1" value="1" id="consent_1" required="required" > </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <label for="consent_1"> We don't do double opt-in. 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You can unsubscribe at any time. </label> </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-4 medium-4 columns">   </div> <div class="large-8 medium-8 columns"> <input type="submit" name="submit_button" value="Subscribe" class="button success expand" id="ddm_subscribe_button" > </div> </div> <div class="row"> <div class="large-12 medium-12 columns large-centered medium-centered"> <p class="text-center"> Unsubscribe at Anytime | <a href="https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/privacy_policy/AnythingGoes/" target="_blank" > Privacy Policy </a> </p> </div> </div> </div> </div> </form>  Wed, 04 Nov 2026 10:33:00 GMT https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261104053326/ (j)One-liner #349 https://dadanew.mindconnection.com/cgi-bin/mail.cgi/archive/AnythingGoes/20261103053447/ <p><span style="font-size:11pt"><span style="font-family:Calibri,"sans-serif""><span style="font-size:12.0pt"><span style="font-family:"Arial","sans-serif"">What do you call an alligator in a vest? 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