I contend that for  a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle. - Winston  Churchill ...Continue Reading

The Vegetable in Chief is now infamous for simply wandering off. He has no clue where he is, where he's been, or where he's going. But the rest of us know where he's taken us. Cue in Cher, "If I could turn back time…." ...Continue Reading

In a comforting voice say, "I'm not one of those people who insults scum like you for trying to rip off other people over the phone. Just so you know." ...Continue Reading

Tim BurrJacques IccheJack Aughff ...Continue Reading

My son was chewing on wires, so I had to ground him. He's doing better currently and conducting himself properly. ...Continue Reading

Q: What should you do if you find a huge zit on your ass any time in the next 3 months? A: Squeeze out the pus and send it in along with your federal income taxes ...Continue Reading

Suppose you were an idiot.  And suppose you were a member of Congress. But then I repeat  myself. - Mark  Twain   ...Continue Reading

The phrase "Christmas gift" is an oxymoron. A gift, by definition, is something you give to another person without being compensated. At Christmas, people "give" so-called "gifts" while expecting something of similar value in return.  The whole process defies logic. People send you crap you don't want, and you go spend 2 hours in line at a store standing behind people who are cutting turkey farts, just so you can get a refund. And the other person is doing the same. Why not just send e ...Continue Reading

It might be fun to wait outside a Home Depot entrance and ask 50 incoming customers to name the vegetable that most closely resembles Joe Biden. ...Continue Reading

'Twas the day after Christmas, and all through the house Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.  The cookies I'd nibble, the eggnog I'd taste At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.  When I got on the scales there arose such a number! When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber).  I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared; The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared, The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese And the way I'd never said: "No thank you, please." &nb ...Continue Reading