AnythingGoes Archives

 

(j)Conversion

July 14th 2024 EST

A Jewish son tells his father he is moving out. The son returns a year later and tells his father that he has converted to Christianity. The father is upset and calls his friend who is also Jewish. “You won’t believe this, my son David moved out for a year and came back and told me he converted to Christianity.”  His friend says, “you won’t believe this...my son Benjamin moved away for a year and when he came back HE converted to Christianity too”! Both upset, they call their rabbi and explain what happened.   ...Continue Reading

(j)The Loan

July 13th 2024 EST

A blonde walks in a bank to get a loan. “I need to borrow $100 for a month,” she says. The banker frowns, but takes her information anyway. He runs her credit but can’t find a report. “I’m sorry,” he says, “but in the absence of a credit record, we’ll have to charge 20% interest on the loan, and you’ll need to put up collateral. “What does that mean?” the blonde says. “It means,” the banker says, “you’ll have to repay us $120, and you’ll need to give us something more valuable to hold onto until you pay u ...Continue Reading

The goal of Bidenomics

July 12th 2024 EST

Bidenomics is part of DEI. They want to make sure that when it comes to poverty, everyone feels included. ...Continue Reading

(j)Punishing Telescammers, #237

July 11th 2024 EST

Interrupt and say, "I'm sorry, I though you were the diarrhea assistance people calling me back. Last week, I got help from the constipation assistance line and now I can't stop going." ...Continue Reading

(j)Don't divorce!

July 10th 2024 EST

Her mother says, "You're married to a multi-millionaire businessman, you live in an 8 bedroom mansion, you drive a Ferrari, you get $2,000 a week allowance, you take 6 vacations a year and you want to throw all that away over 45 cents?" ...Continue Reading

(j)One-liner #255

July 9th 2024 EST

Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?It's okay. He woke up. ...Continue Reading

IRS T-shirts, #227

July 8th 2024 EST

IRS:Useless PeopleWho Enjoy DestroyingUseful People ...Continue Reading

(j) Going Out in Style

July 7th 2024 EST

Unable to attend the funeral after his father died, a son who lived far away called his brother and told him, "Do something nice for Dad and send me the bill."  Later, he got a bill for $200.00, which he paid. The next month, he got another bill for $200.00, which he also paid, figuring it was some incidental expense.  Bills for $200.00 kept arriving every month, and finally the man called his brother again to find out what was going on.  "Well," said the other brother, "you said ...Continue Reading

(j) Street Name

July 6th 2024 EST

"I'd like the number for Christine Smith in Richmond, Virginia," the young man said to the 411 operator.  "There are multiple listings for Christine Smith in Richmond, Virginia," the operator said. "Do you have a street name?"  The young man hesitated a moment,  "Well, uh, most people call me Snake." ...Continue Reading

What year is it?

July 5th 2024 EST

 https://x.com/mazemoore/status/1809315343212638406 ...Continue Reading
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