AnythingGoes Archives

 

(j)The Antisemite

August 24th 2024 EDT

Peter, a well known anti-Semite, walks into a bar and is about to order a drink When he sees a guy close by with yalmakah and payos, he doesn't have to be an Einstein to know that this guy is Jewish.  So he shouts over to the bartender so everyone can hear, "Drinks for everyone in here, bartender, but not for that Jew over there." Soon after the drinks have been handed out, he notices that the Jewish guy is smiling, and waves to him and says, "Thank you." This infuriates him and in a l ...Continue Reading

Happiness is….

August 23rd 2024 EDT

Joe Biden's picture on a milk carton. ...Continue Reading

(j)Punishing Telescammers, #243

August 22nd 2024 EDT

Interrupt and say, "You should go to an Italian deli, get a carton of spimoni, add rat poison to it, and eat it. You'd be doing the world a favor." ...Continue Reading

(j)Hollywood Squares, #10

August 21st 2024 EDT

Q. When a couple has a baby, who is responsible for its sex? A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him. ...Continue Reading

(j)One-liner #261

August 20th 2024 EDT

Another wooden ball! Why can't the makers of avocadoes put a different toy inside? ...Continue Reading

IRS T-shirts, #230

August 19th 2024 EDT

IRS:Your Innocence Is NotConsidered ...Continue Reading

(j)Hollywood Squares, #9

August 18th 2024 EDT

Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant? A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant? ...Continue Reading

(j)Hollywood Squares, #8

August 17th 2024 EDT

Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people? A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the Army. ...Continue Reading

Impeachment double standard

August 16th 2024 EDT

The communists impeached Trump four times. At the end of his first term, we had the lowest unemployment in 50 years, the rate of inflation was decreasing, we were energy-independent, we met our CO2 targets, peace was being brokered in the Middle East, Russia stayed out of Ukraine, and businesses were growing. All of the opposite is true now after 3 years of Biden. And yet, not a single impeachment. I wish I were joking ...Continue Reading

(j)Punishing Telescammers, #242

August 15th 2024 EDT

When the scammer pauses, ask, "Did your parents take you to the zoo when you were a kid?" If YES, then "It's too bad the zoo refused to keep you." If NO, then "They should have done that and left you there." ...Continue Reading
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