Why is bread like the sun? It rises in the yeast and settles in the waist. ...Continue Reading

Most people are shocked when they find out how incompetent Bill is as an electrician. ...Continue Reading

There's a new form for filing your federal income tax. It's form 1040-SUP.It's a suppository. The IRS can shove it up their ass. ...Continue Reading

The best way to sell a home security system is to stop by when nobody is home and leave a brochure on the kitchen table. ...Continue Reading

A politician running for office visits a small rural town and says to the Mayor, "I'm here to help you. What are your needs?" The Mayor says, "We have two basic needs. First, we have a hospital but no doctor. Can you help us with that?" The politician walks to the far side of the room, pulls out his cell phone, and talks into it for a short while. When he's done, he says, "I took care of that need. A doctor will be here soon. I hope that's before the election, but it could be after. No ...Continue Reading

Nixon dropped bombs on Cambodia. Biden drops bombs down his pant leg. ...Continue Reading

Interrupt and ask him his name again. Whatever he says, call him something else and make some comment about the weather. ...Continue Reading

Her Diary Entry:My husband was in an odd mood Saturday night. We planned to meet at a cafe for a drink. I spent the afternoon shopping with the girls and I thought it might have been my fault because I was a bit later than I promised but he didn't say anything about it. I don't remember doing anything to make him upset, but I could tell there was something wrong. The conversation was quite slow going so I thought we should go off to someplace intimate so we could talk more privately. We went to this restaurant and ...Continue Reading

The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was. ...Continue Reading

IRS:Where Harming theInnocentIs An Art Form ...Continue Reading