A bouncer was in charge of deciding whether people could come into the night club. Unbeknownst to the management, he was a racist. And he hated "white" people. Three people approached the door. The bouncer looked at the black guy and said, "Name the last three presidents of the USA." The guy laughed and rattled off their names. "Fine," the bouncer said, "I'll let you in when I open the door."  Turning to the Hispanic, he said, "Name the current President of the ...Continue Reading

Download a video or audio recording of a dog barking. Or record it yourself. Have this ready for the next few telescammers. You know what to do….                                                               &n ...Continue Reading

(these are from newspaper clippings!)Sirius BonnerYoshie TakeashitaYoYo Moore (no relation to YoYo Ma?) ...Continue Reading

My girlfriend left me because she couldn't handle my OCD. I told her to close the door five times on her way out. ...Continue Reading

After enjoying a 40 year career in crime, a woman retired from the IRS. Years later, she's walking down the street and dragging two plastic garbage bags. She inadvertently snags the bag on something and a couple of $20 bills pop out. Noticing this, a policeman stops her. "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag."  The old woman thanks him for letting her know, puts a wad of chewing gum over the hole, and starts on her way again. "Well, now, not so fast," says the cop. & ...Continue Reading

You wash a garment with a tissue in the pocket and your entire laundry comes out covered with lint.   ...Continue Reading

There are always one or two ice cubes that won't pop out of the tray. ...Continue Reading

After being fake-elected, Joe Biden asked his team to vote on the three best ways to topple America. The winners? Bidenflation, stoking of racism, and restriction of our fuel supply. And now you know why life is so much tougher now! ...Continue Reading

Every time he asks you a question, fire back with one of those challenge questions used for online account security. "What was your mother's maiden name? What is your favorite color? Who was your favorite teacher?" Every time you get an answer, ask why. Even for the mother's maiden name. ...Continue Reading

(these are from newspaper clippings!)Gay NeighborsDick Dong WangDick Black (he's a musician, motto is "A taste of Dick Black") ...Continue Reading