AnythingGoes Archives

 

(j)Hollywood Squares, #4

August 7th 2024 EDT

Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married? A. Rose Marie: No; wait until morning ...Continue Reading

(j)One-liner #259

August 6th 2024 EDT

I got over my addiction to chocolate, marshmallows, and nuts. I won't lie, it was a rocky road. ...Continue Reading

IRS T-shirts, #229

August 5th 2024 EDT

IRS:Inculcating FearViaUnlawful Aggression ...Continue Reading

(j)Hollywood Squares, #3

August 4th 2024 EDT

Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes. ...Continue Reading

(j)Hollywood Squares, #2

August 3rd 2024 EDT

Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it. ...Continue Reading

(j)Biden and the zoo

August 2nd 2024 EDT

When Joe Biden was little, his parents frequently took him to the zoo. Unfortunately, the zoo refused to take him in and they sent him right back to his parents. ...Continue Reading

(j)Punishing Telescammers, #240

August 1st 2024 EDT

If the caller asks you for by name, use some other name. For example, "Hello, may I speak to Jeff?" Reply with, "This is Dan" even if you are Jeff. This will confuse the scammer. Either he will ask again for Jeff, in which case you say "I just shot him in the forehead" or "So I'm not good enough to speak to?" or he'll switch to talking to Dan. If he says, "OK, Dan, I'll talk to you" then you say, "Sorry, but you have to speak with Arlene about that and she's not in ...Continue Reading

(j)Hollywood Squares, #1

July 31st 2024 EDT

Q. Do female frogs croak?A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough. ...Continue Reading

(j)One-liner #258

July 30th 2024 EDT

The CDC conducted a $15 million study on the effects of alcohol on the way a person walks, and the results were staggering. ...Continue Reading

Today's Pop Quiz

July 29th 2024 EDT

What kind of mobile phone do IRS agents use? Being cocksuckers, IRS men use the iSuck. It's not polite to say what the IRS females use. ...Continue Reading
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