After enjoying a 40 year career in crime, a woman retired from the IRS.

Years later, she's walking down the street and dragging two plastic garbage bags. She inadvertently snags the bag on something and a couple of $20 bills pop out.

Noticing this, a policeman stops her. "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag."

The old woman thanks him for letting her know, puts a wad of chewing gum over the hole, and starts on her way again.

"Well, now, not so fast," says the cop. "A bag of cash is unusual. How did you get all that money? Did you steal it?"

"Oh, no," says the old woman. "You see, my back yard backs up to the parking lot of the football stadium. Each time there's a game, male fans sneak into my bushes and pee right on my flower beds."

The cop nods.

"So," she says, "I stand behind the bushes with a big hedge clipper, and each time someone sticks his dick through the bushes, I say '$20 or off it comes!'"

"Hey, not a bad idea!" laughs the cop. "OK, good luck! By the way, what's in the other bag?"

"Well," says the retired IRS woman, "not all of them pay."